YOO HOO DARLING!
Illustration by Sydney Marra
It’s not that we have been absolutely horrid. In reality, we have been quite good this year. Recall that we let that tea sandwich of a man with the bizarre bustier jump the queue at the Versace H&M presentation sale.
Of course you remember when we gave our coveted September Issue (‘08 Vogue featuring Sienna Miller – the one featured in the documentary on Anna Wintour) to cousins in Michigan (it was even signed by RJ Cutler!)
And, we are still keeping our promise from last year to wear only vintage fur from now on.
We feel that these concessions entitle us to a few holiday perks. Specifically, and in no particular order, we are asking you to consider gifting the following:
1. There is the matter of transportation: It is not that we dislike GREEN HORNET (beloved 1997 Nissan Pathfinder) but now that the radio won’t budge off of WASH FM (sadly the only working option) and the engine refuses to go over 42 mph without a pep talk, we think the all new 2012 Ferrari FF Supercharged Neiman Marcus Edition (651 horsepower V12 engine = 0 to 60 mph in less than 3.7 seconds) complete with a five-piece set of matching Ferrari luggage and 7 speed dual clutch transmission available for purchase in this year’s Neiman Marcus Christmas Book for $395,000. DIVINE!
2. Also, regarding a new handbag: During a drive to the country aka Anacostia, our vintage GUCCI clutch was irreparably damaged. No worries, the iridescent caviar calfskin Chanel tote with mademoiselle turnlock is a perfect substitute.
3. You should know that we now feel that we have grown up & into wearing diamonds. Therefore the Tiffany rose cut garden flower earrings (just $5000) are absolutely necessary. After that yummy water Polo match, is it any wonder that we cannot locate our pearls?
4. Santa, do be a darling and stuff the Wolford stockings above the fireplace with a few (20) macaroons from Pierre Hermé (Paris) along with Mariage Bamame Tea (London). Don’t forget to leave the Greenbrier and Four Seasons Spa (oxygen facial with Lisa) gift certificates and the roundtrip (first class) plane tickets to Belize. (Naturally, we can’t miss Zoe’s wedding, can we?)
In exchange, we will leave the Kahlua & cream in the pink china cup just like last time along with a strawberry tart from Buddha Bar.
Your number one Doll,
thanking you in advance,
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